Talking about sexual abuse of children or adults is hard. And it’s especially hard when the abuse occurs in a minority group, whether from leaders or members of the group. We don’t ever want to discuss abusers in marginalized groups out of fear that it will be used against the group. Talking about sexual abuse committed by members of minority groups is taboo. Women, children, and men have been told to keep quiet. Discussing abuse would reflect badly on their community and could be used to justify over policing and violence. Many books have been written by women of color about their experiences. They were told to keep their abuse quiet because the rape of women and children fed into the racist stereotypes about non-whites.
The same thing has happened in the LGBT community. British accused rapist and convicted pedophile Karen White, a trans-identified woman who retained male genitalia, was housed in a female jail and within days had sexually assaulted four other inmates. Canadian serial rapist Christopher Hambrook, who claimed to be transgender to get into women’s shelters, was overlooked for a long time because of his “identity.” It was hard to discuss a person who identified as trans as being a serial rapist; it fit so well into the anti-trans bathroom bill talking points. Someone said they were trans to get into women’s only space and raped women. Some people I know have been called TERFs when they call out abuse by a member of the trans community, the fact that the women called TERFs are themselves trans women is overlooked. They said something bad about a trans person. Therefore they hate all trans people. That has been the mindset for too long, and this mindset must end.
I bring it these examples up because they highlight the importance of identifying abusers in minority groups and because we can no longer continue to deny the existence of these abusers. This is the age of MeToo, the gags have been removed and the blinders are off. The Catholic church in the United States is being forced by the courts to release thousands of documents showing a long-term abuse of children at the hands of the clergy. Women who we see in positions of power and prominence in the media and politics are coming forward with stories of abuse at the hands of male colleges or bosses. Anonymous online advocates are standing up for young girls who were raped in small towns in America and Canada and calling out law enforcement for ignoring their claims. Sometimes even going so far as to find evidence themselves and sharing it with the media to force the hand of prosecutors.
As part of my dissertation, I very briefly discussed sexual abuse in the broader pagan community. Following the revelations of what went on in the Catholic Church in my home state of PA, several friends and colleagues talked about how they knew several of the priests involved, how they had heard stories for years. Sometimes this was an open secret and, for one priest who had a speedboat and lots of girlfriends, it was a joke. My grandfather once went off on a Monsignor for his actions with women; the man was later named in the suit. I’m so proud of my grandfather.
The ongoing discussion about sexual misconduct in the Catholic church and private schools, and what I had read about during my research, compelled me to write this article. I am calling out the leaders of the pagan community for ignoring sexual abuse out of fear that it played into stereotypes about pagans. It’s time for us to openly communicate with each other to identify abusers and protect our sisters and brothers from sexual predators. It’s time to confront the monsters among us head on and not be part of the “keep your mouth shut” culture. It’s time to talk about abuse in Paganism and Goddess-centered communities.
(To be Continued)
(Meet Mago Contributor) Rev. Francesca Tronetti Ph.D.
Re: Lets talk About Abuse… Yes, all kinds of abuse MUST be identified and dealt with.